Sunday, December 31, 2017

The Sound Of One Hand Typing FM Has Left The Air


I have decided to terminate the simulcast of The Sound of One Hand Typing from WordPress to Blogger. You can now follow the blog over there. You can also subscribe via RSS or by email.

Saturday, December 30, 2017

You Say You Want A Resolution, We-ell You Know… #socs

I just have to share this from Cathy Kennedy’s resolution post:

I used to make New Year’s resolutions, and by the second week of January they were forgotten, so I stopped doing that. The latest trend is to choose a word to use as a theme for the year. I think I did that once, too, with the same result. So I don’t do that, either.

Just about everyone I’ve talked to in Blog World has a quiet evening at home planned for New Year’s Eve, including us. We can watch the crazies in Times Square and Underground Atlanta without having to be among them. We’re going to have our traditional pizza rolls for dinner (how that tradition started, or when, I can’t remember) and probably fall asleep in front of the TV until the fireworks in the neighborhood (Insane Ike’s Fireworks over in Alabama does almost as much business for New Year’s Eve as they do for Independence Day, to judge by the racket in our subdivision) wake us up to celebrate the new year. I told Kat (from Mama’s Losin’ It!) that I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been out on New Year’s Eve, and that’s over my entire life (this will be my 62nd). And one of those times was Kip and I going to the Convenient in Northfield, Illinois to get Cokes (and I needed cigarettes). Along the way, we were stopped by an officer of the Township of Northfield Police Department, who wanted to know what we were doing out at that hour (it was eight-thirty, I think, because Convenient closed at nine).

Speaking of fireworks (which I was a minute ago), ever notice the stores that sell them all have names like “Crazy Cal’s,” “Mad Moe’s,” and “Two-Finger Louie’s”? We used to drive through Tennessee on our way to Chicago, and just as you started getting into the mountains, there was a gas station that had big signs that said “COLD BEER” and “FIREWORKS.” Gasoline, beer, and fireworks… I’m surprised they haven’t had an avalanche up there.


Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now a word from Korbel champagne. Toast life!

Happy New Year!




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Friday, December 29, 2017

The Friday 5×2: 1978 One-Hit Wonders

So, we’re almost at the end of the Seventies. 1978 was the year I graduated from college (BBA, Loyola University Chicago), got married, and started working for a living. In fact, I had two jobs, my first lasting all of six months. I seem to have a better recollection of the music from this year, and there were some iconic songs, and a few that went on to become hits for other artists. Here are ten of them.

  1. Randy Newman, “Short People” We had a bridesmaid in our wedding who was all of 4’11” tall who hated this song. Interesting that Randy Newman is considered a one-hit wonder, considering the number of songs he’s written that were hits for other artists. This was a #1 hit when we got married.
  2. Johnny Paycheck, “Take This Job And Shove It” Jonathon Brandmeier, who was a radio personality in Chicago, had a weekly feature called the “Shove-It Line” on Fridays, where people who were fed up with the week would call in and tell their bosses where they could stick their jobs. Usually the last person was someone who was celebrating their last day on the job. I was tempted to call in for more than a couple of jobs. This was a #1 hit on the Country charts in the US and Canada, his only #1 in a career that started in the Sixties.
  3. Steve Martin & The Toot Uncommon, “King Tut” A real classic. This is the performance from Saturday Night Live that had Mary and I gasping for air, we were laughing so hard. That’s Lou Marini, former saxophonist for Blood, Sweat & Tears and The Blues Brothers Band, emerging from the sarcophagus for his solo. (I’m not sure that’s the “sarcophagus,” but it sounds better than “mummy case.”) Reached #14 on the Hot 100.
  4. Exile, “Kiss You All Over” Exile reached #1 for four weeks in October, their only success on the pop charts. They moved on to country music in the Eighties after two follow-up singles failed to reach the Top 20.
  5. Nick Gilder, “Hot Child In The City” This was Nick Gilder’s only Top 20 hit in the US, though he reached #1 in his native Canada with “Roxy Roller” in 1976. The song was featured in the 1984 movie Angel (“honor student by day – hooker by night!”), one of my guilty pleasures (it was actually pretty good), from which the clips that comprise the video were taken.
  6. John Paul Young, “Love Is In The Air” Scottish-born Australian pop singer Young had his one taste of international success with this, which went to #7 in the US. I think of this video whenever I hear it, because you can hear it starting at 1:15. Worth it to watch if only to see how far we’ve come in computer graphics in the last 35 years.
  7. Alicia Bridges, “I Love The Nightlife” I’m breaking my own “no disco!” rule for this one, mostly because I remember this SCTV sketch (you can hear Eugene Levy-as-Perry Como’s version at 1:00). Alicia reached #2 with this and had further success on the dance chart.
  8. Patti Smith Group, “Because The Night” Reached #17 in June, helping sales of her Easter album and giving her second thoughts about retiring. The song was written by Bruce Springsteen and later covered by 10,000 Maniacs in 1993 for an episode of MTV Unplugged, the version I remenber best.
  9. Walter Egan, “Magnet And Steel” Walter was backed by Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks on his one Top 20 hit, which spent 22 weeks on the chart and went as high as #8.
  10. LeBlanc & Carr, “Falling” Lenny LeBlanc had been in a band with Pete Carr, who was a producer and session guitarist in Muscle Shoals, Alabama. Carr convinced LeBlanc to join him, and they recorded three singles together, including this, which reached #8. They were evidently bumped from the flight that killed several members of Lynyrd Skynyrd, after whih LeBlanc became a born-again Christian and started recording Christian-themed music. I’ll be honest, I don’t remember hearing this one.

And that’s your Friday 5×2 for December 29, 2017. Happy New Year!




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Thursday, December 28, 2017

Writer’s Workshop: Nuttier Than A…


JASON BORSETH/Missourian 515-991-1744
Monks at Assumption Abbey Monastery in Ava, Missouri Feb. 17, 2006.

Fruitcake is the joke of the Christmas season. For example, A. Lee Martinez, in his book Gil’s All-Fright Diner, said “Reality is like a fruitcake; pretty enough to look at but with all sorts of nasty things lurking just beneath the surface.” And Johnny Carson said, “The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.” Just DuckDuckGo “fruitcake jokes,” and you’ll get plenty.

Actually, it’s not that bad, depending on where you get it from. My favorite is from the Trappist monks at Our Lady of the Holy Spirit Monastery in Conyers, Georgia, about thirty miles from me. The monastery itself is a beautiful place and it’s home to men who have dedicated their lives to God. Many of them are old and infirm, and the sale of bakery items helps pay for their medical care. I spent a week on retreat there almost thirty years ago, and it was a beautiful experience. I’m very fond of those guys. Every abbey has ther own recipe, it seems; the picture shows an example of the fruitcake made by the monks of Assumption Abbey in Missouri.

There was a place across the street from my grammar school that sold a “Jule Kake,” which was essentially a fruitcake. At least, that’s what they told me. The place was never open when I tried to drop by. I never saw anyone in there, either. Very strange. Makes you wonder what they were really selling.

Mary makes a good fresh fruit cake and adds cranberries, apples and pears. I don’t have the recipe, unfortunately, but trust me, it’s good.

Anyway, the title refers to the phrase “nuttier than a fruitcake.” When you say that someone is nuttier than a fruitcake, you’re saying he’s koo-koo for Cocoa Puffs, just like Sonny in the commercials.

General Mills has Cocoa Puffs, Trix and Kix. It’s all the same cereal, but Trix is fruit-flavored, Cocoa Puffs is chocolate-flavored, and Kix has no flavor added. Doesn’t taste especially pleasant, either. But that’s just me.




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Wednesday, December 27, 2017

A Funny Facebook Comment #1LinerWeds

I follow the Vintage Ads group on Facebook, and recently saw this post on the group. The ad displayed is this one…

This prompted someone to make the following comment…

I was thinking the same thing…


One-Liner Wednesday is brought to you each week by Linda Hill and this station. Now a word from Kentucky Fried Chicken. Visit the Colonel!




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ANNOUNCEMENT: The Sound of One Hand Typing FM Is Leaving The Air

I’ve given it a lot of thought, and have decided to stop “simulcasting” The Sound Of One Hand Typing on Blogger. There are several reasons for this.

  1. I get roughly ten page views a day on it, and most of those are Google indexing the page. I occasionally get comments, but I would say that it averages out to less than one a week. In fact, I’m getting about one a month. It hardly seems worthwhile to continue it.
  2. In order for IFTTT, the technology that makes it all possible, to work, I have to do a lot of extra coding, or it won’t post properly. This is a problem I brought to their attention a couple of years ago, and they still haven’t done anything about it.
  3. Then, once it passes to Blogger, Blogger intercedes on my behalf and “corrects” the HTML code, causing me fits.

The last simulcast post will be on New Year’s Eve. I’ve already started to change my commenting habits on Blogger to reflect this change, and have changed my Blogger profile.

Note that this blog will continue as long as I can still write on it, and maybe after that. Anyone who might be reading that blog via a feed reader can follow this one by clicking on the RSS icon in the right sidebar on the main blog and following the directions.

Thanks to all who gave their input on this. If you have any questions, comments, feel like cussing me out, etc. be sure and leave me a comment.




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Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Two for Tuesday: Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadians (Baby Boom Years)

This is a repost from New Year’s Day, 2013. A lot of things have changed since then, and I figured I should update it for style and dates. I know I’m a little early, but Guy was on the list and by the time we get to next Tuesday it’ll already be 2018…

Happy New Year, everyone! A few days early, I know, but I thought honoring Guy Lombardo and his Royal Canadians was appropriate. He and his orchestra were a fixture of New Year’s Eve from 1928 until 1976, a few months before he died of a heart attack.

Gaetano Alberto “Guy” Lombardo was born in London, Ontario to Italian immigrants Gaetano Sr. and Lena Lombardo in 1902. His father was a tailor and a baritone singer who encouraged Guy and brothers Carmen, Lebert, and Victor to learn musical instruments so that they could accompany him. The band rehearsed in the back of Dad’s tailor shop. They began their prolific recording career in 1926. (Louis Armstrong was a big fan.) They started playing New Year’s Eve at the Roosevelt Hotel in 1928. Generally, their New Year’s Eve broadcasts (both radio and TV beginning in 1956) were carried on the CBS network, though they were syndicated in the late Sixties and early Seventies.

The first song is “On a Slow Boat to China,” featuring a vocal by Kenny Gardner.

“Auld Lang Syne,” the tune for which they are best known, is the second; the tradition is that it’s the song that plays at Times Square at midnight.

I wish you success, happiness, love, and fulfillment in 2018. That’s your Two for Tuesday, December 26, 2017.




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